Eeek! I'm back at work today after four days off. I'm really not enjoying my job at the moment, it's just too hard. Id love to work for myself - start my own company or cafe or something.
I can't believe how much food I ate this weekend I just couldn't stop myself. Not just the wedding but Sunday too. It was like I was in some sort of trance and nothing would pull me out of it. My weight has still remained at or close to 125 - I've been trying to hold it there for a few weeks now before loosing any more weight.
Weddings have such a strange effect on me. It's like I turn into psycho girlfriend or something. (only in my head though - i try to reign in the crazy around my boyfriend!) but it's like...
When are you going to ask me to marry you?!
I know I'm young, but we've been together so long and are so sure about each other. We've spoken about it and so I know that getting married is where we both wanna be at at some point. I guess I'm just in more of a rush than him. It's just so important to me to get married, I feel like things will only be right once we are. A lot of our friends are married or engaged. When will it be my turn?! :( I take it so personally when he doesn't ask me though. Like if we go somelacw nice or for a nice walk, I work myself up about it so much and keep convincing myself "tonight could be the night" but it never is. Why am I so goddamned obsessed with this?!?! I just feel like somethings missing. I wish he would hurry up and ask me. Soon!!! It's got to be sometime this year, surely. Ands it's another motivation for my diet too. I can never talk to him about this, or ask him myself. Being proposed to is such an amazing experience, and I wouldn't want to miss that for the world. I'm such a traditionalist - he has to ask me. Unprompted.
Ughh can someone please shake me?!?!